Padaviya



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melissa mcewan


Friday, Mar 30th, 2012
There are the occasions that men—intellectual men, clever men, engaged men—insist on playing devil’s advocate, desirous of a debate on some aspect of feminist theory or reproductive rights or some other subject generally filed under the heading: Women’s Issues. These intellectual, clever, engaged men want to endlessly probe my argument for weaknesses, want to wrestle over details, want to argue just for fun—and they wonder, these intellectual, clever, engaged men, why my voice keeps raising and why my face is flushed and why, after an hour of fighting my corner, hot tears burn the corners of my eyes. Why do you have to take this stuff so personally? ask the intellectual, clever, and engaged men, who have never considered that the content of the abstract exercise that’s so much fun for them is the stuff of my life.

Melissa McEwan, of course, on the terrible bargain. My life as a woman, as a queer person, as a fat person, is not your thought experiment.  (via sanitywatchers)

This really struck a chord. Even my boyfriend, feminist that he is, can have this reaction when I’m in tears after an NPR story. This is my fucking life. Excuse me if I can’t remove the personal. 

(via curiousgeorgiana)

I reblogged this before, but I like it a lot so I’m reblogging it again. 

This whole thing is the reason why confrontations with people that I consider friends always leaves me crying. Like, I get so angry and so flustered because it’s not just some stupid game to me, like it is to them. It’s something that’s real and personal.

(via liquidiousfleshbag)

I like this, & taking things personally. I get upset & frustrated dealing with devil’s advocate friends & acquaintances too, much more so than with obvious bigots or strangers. And because how else are you supposed to take things but personally? And when did it get decided (& by whom) that an emotional response is automatically less valid, less informed or less intelligent?

(via ecritureacreature)


∞08:39 pm, reblogged from écriture, a creature by padaviya8,031 notes
[feminist] [feminism] [melissa mcewan] [terrible bargain]

Monday, Nov 14th, 2011
There are the jokes about women, about wives, about mothers, about raising daughters, about female bosses. They are told in my presence by men who are meant to care about me, just to get a rise out of me, as though I am meant to find funny a reminder of my second-class status. I am meant to ignore that this is a bullying tactic, that the men telling these jokes derive their amusement specifically from knowing they upset me, piss me off, hurt me. They tell them and I can laugh, and they can thus feel superior, or I can not laugh, and they can thus feel superior. Heads they win, tails I lose.
Melissa McEwan from the article: The Terrible Bargain We Have Regretfully Struck (via msandrogynous)

∞08:43 am, reblogged from Miumachi by padaviya45 notes
[feminist] [feminism] [melissa mcewan]