Padaviya

Could we, please, try doing without some or all of the following for once? Just give it a try, see if we can get by without:

• Freakishly long fingernails
• Excessive eye makeup
• The “blowjob—>vaginal—>{anal—>}{blowjob—>}facial cumshot” formula
• Sex always being male-initiated and controlled — come on, what’s wrong the lady jumping her guy or wrestling to get on top?
• The mindset that sex has to be degrading to women to be arousing
• The idea that there’s something unusual and dirty about a woman who wants to get off
• Sleazy asshole men
• Picture sets that never show the man’s face, or really anything much apart from his dick
• Male porn stars who aren’t even really physically attractive apart from their dicks (Possible exception for Ron Jeremy)
• Creepy “blacks on blondes” porn that treats black men like animals and ends up coming across like some sort of beastiality porn for racists.
• Pigtails
• The obsession with 18 year-olds
• The “schoolgirl” thing in general

(via porncull)

I’ll admit that stained sheets are an annoyance, but getting menstrual blood on oneself is a monthly occurrence for women, and yet we somehow manage to avoid PTSD. Understanding this, and accepting that the vagina is part of the female reproductive system and not just a sterile hole for your dick, is an important step toward becoming a man worthy of fucking. 
Yesterday I recommended that women quit treating periods as a female-only topic, and I’d like to reiterate that recommendation now. Last year I had to teach a 25-year-old man — who had previously lived with a long-term girlfriend — that women do in fact need to use more than one tampon per period, and I think it’s high time that guys started getting this information early. Comprehensive sex ed can help — while the girls in my fifth grade class were getting our first “changing bodies” lecture, the boys were watching The Mighty Ducks or something, and there’s no reason boys shouldn’t get the opportunity to hear the gym teacher say “uterine lining” too. But more than that, if boys and girls and men and women would all stop treating menstruation like some ultra-private phenomenon, the world — and the vagina — would be a happier place.

So I wonder, what would the same kind of advice look like if it appeared in a men’s magazine? Perhaps it would read something like this… (cue dream sequence)

How to Be Happy With Less Sex: Have Less Sex!
If you’re like a lot of men, your wife or girlfriend almost never wants to have sex with you. No matter how many times you grab her tits while watching TV or rub your morning wood against her back, she just doesn’t seem to warm up to your advances.

In fact, between work, watching football, and clocking the obligatory hour with your girlfriend’s friends, not having sex has become just another item on many men’s to-do lists — something we feel like we have to do in order to please our wives or girlfriends.

Well, that needn’t be the case, says sex expert Bruce Johnson**. In fact, he says, there’s an easy way around this problem.

“Every time you want to have sex,” says Johnson, “don’t.”

By ignoring what your body is telling you and stifling your natural urges, eventually you’ll notice that your sex drive is almost completely gone — much to your girlfriend’s delight.

“The amazing thing about the human body is it’s ability to acclimate,” said Johnson, who is the author of several books, including Third-Wave Feminists: Hard To Trick and Your Wife: Not Like Other Problems. “The less you have sex, the less you want it.”

How to achieve the seemingly impossible? Here are some tips (but just the tip! LOL):

You and your girlfriend are sitting on the couch watching TV. During commercials, all you can do is stare at her funbags. You start to lean into them with your tongue out while she’s not paying attention — the same way you always do foreplay.

When I do sexual assault prevention education, I often start with a standard little activity, where the first person names the number of people they know who have been sexually assaulted, and then the second person adds the people they’ve known to that, and the third adds theirs to that and so on. So if you know one person you say, “One,” and then if the next person knows two people, they say “Three,” and so on. You see?

I did that this morning, went around the group, listened to them add. There were 22 students in the group.

By the time they got to the end, the number was 84.

84.

With 22 students in the group.

I didn’t cry until I got home, more than 8 hours later. Quite proud of that.

Why do I do this work, when there are days like this, that eat away at me?

I do it BECAUSE days like this exist. And because 22 women, representing 84 survivors, show up to a classroom on a sunny Thursday morning to learn how to stop it.

Via Adam Serwer’s blog, the Washington Post’s Greg Sargent offers a handy explanation for why the New York Times‘ decision not to describe U.S. waterboarding as “torture” reveals bias:

Think of it this way: We all agree that pickpocketing constitutes “theft.” A pickpocket doesn’t get to come along and argue: “No, what I did isn’t theft, it’s merely pickpocketing, and therefore it isn’t illegal.” Any newspaper that played along with a pickpocket’s demand to stop using the word “theft” would be taking the pickpocket’s side, not occupying any middle ground. There is no middle ground here.

Remember that the next time the media calls intimate partner violence and sexual assault by any-other-name. When a publication calls rape “sex,” it is not reserving judgment before trial. When it describes an accused assailant as “a loose cannon” and a “bad boy,” it is not adding color. When it characterizes self-defense after sexual assault as a “bar fight,” it is not being fair. It’s taking sides.

Canadian teens are waiting longer and having safer sex than previous generations, an audience at the University of Guelph’s 32nd annual Sexuality Conference heard Tuesday morning.

Elizabeth Saewyc, a researcher at the University of British Columbia, said the media and many adults perpetuate the idea that wild parties and reckless sex are rampant among Canadian teens.

“When it comes to teen sex, there’s a lot of buzz out there,” Saewyc said. “But the reality is that most teens today are sexually healthier than teens of a decade ago.”